Today was the last day of my junior high days. Truthfully, I'm not sad to see it go, but I'm scared for the future. I can't even imagine myself in a few days time from now because my head's so messed up right now. I don't know what to think, and I don't know what to do. And there's that same empty hole that won't be filled with anything except what was there in the first place, something I can't have and will never get back, no matter how I beg and plead. The sky clouded over again today, and the wind blew and the clouds darkened to a near black, but it wouldn't rain. Nothing will grow if it doesn't rain. It seems as though the clouds refuse to let their burdens go.

Anyways, enough of the my-soul-is-a-bottomless-black-pit-of-despair junk. I usually save that for my blog...which might explain why I'm so messed up in the head. I haven't written there for nearly six months. Regardless, I'll stop now.

So talent show was today. I didn't screw up too bad, though it did happen. Thank the Lord for my acting skills or I would have bolted off stage and gone to cry somewhere. I managed to sing the song I wrote, but barely. Lately I've been getting the lyrics mixed up, like singing the second verse before the first. I'd post the lyrics but they aren't anything special. They're simple and grammatically incorrect. And also not very imaginative. Then again, most music these days is like that. One of my former teachers told me she would have helped me with developing it. Again, it's a miracle. I particularly dislike that teacher, and I won't say her name because that would be mean. And I have more class than that.

After a couple of hours of drama on the part of the local 'emo kids'--we call them this sometimes because they're always crying in a corner somewhere, or hating the world, or hating each other, or hating in general, and they always have abysmal-black-holes-of-darkness souls--they left and we went to the pool. Where it was freezing cold and we actually ate ice cream in the change rooms because it was so cold. I miss the days when our school wasn't so cheap as to send us to the community pool. Once upon a time we went to West Ed for wrap-up. THAT was WAY better. You couldn't even hear the radio at the little pool across the street. West Ed has a live DJ. Figure that one out.

So I'm leaving that school that had bad memories equal to good times. I'll shed my burdens, leave it behind and move on to something more hopeful.

I'll say this once--and if you don't know already, which would mean you are deaf, dumb and blind--Michael Jackson is dead. It's too bad, I guess, but his creative juices had run out. It is a shame though that future generations won't know who he is. I'm already finding little kids who haven't heard of him. Either that'll happen, or parents will start saying, "Don't take candy from strangers. It could be another Michael Jackson."

Enough of that. It's late. Dad's calling the house to wake me up tomorrow WAY too early for my first day of Summer Vacation. I might get some sleep tonight after I've shed a tear for the lost.